I Just Enrolled Austyn in Kindergarten & I Can't Stop Crying..
😭"I WONT BE ABLE TO AFFORD THAT!!!"
Nick and I were laying on the couch we'd moved into a corner of our Master Bedroom. He couldn't sleep in the bed anymore, the pain was too much.
We were talking about Austyn's life. Having an unbearably hard conversation that we needed to get out of the way, just in case the doctors were actually right. Just in case he wouldn't be able to help me raise her...
I had asked him to tell me what kind of life he wanted his daughter to live and one of the things that he thought would be incredible would be to send her to a private Christian school. We both grew up in public schools and wouldn't trade our experiences for the world (and this post is NOT meant to start an argument on which is better), but Nick knew that he wanted Austyn to grow up with a foundation rooted in faith. At the time, I wasn't even sure *what* I thought about that.
But, religion aside... there was an entirely different matter to consider. A more practical one. PRIVATE SCHOOLS ARE EXPENSIVE!!
I was SOO SURE that my life would NEVER give me an opportunity to send my kid to a private school...
But, what I didn't realize at the time and what it took me YEARS to figure out, AFTER Nick had passed... was that, in so many ways, it was MY CHOICE if I wanted to give my kids those opportunities!!
Had I never gotten my butt of that same couch years later, as a 26 year old widow and DECIDED I was going to improve my health so I could actually excel at my job, I would have never STUMBLED upon online fitness accountability groups. Had I never stumbled on these online accountability groups, I would have NEVER realized my potential to get SO MUCH MORE ISH done when my body is functioning at optimal level. Had I never gotten my body to function at optimal level, I would have never decided that I wanted to DEVOTE my life to helping other women do the same (& transform hearts along the way). And, had I never DEVOTED my life to helping others, I would have NEVER been able to create my own Brave Babes Virtual Fit Tribes.
It's INSANE that I get paid to do the work that I do, because I would do it for FREE. But, the fact that it's affording me the opportunity to not just work from home, be a 24/7 family, go on vacations galore ANNND enroll my child in a PRIVATE Christian School...
ALL THINGS I **NEVER** THOUGHT WOULD BE POSSIBLE FOR ME.... Ya'll this brings tears to my eyes.
Nick... Your faith was SO real. And, you always knew anything was possible. Babe, I'm so sorry I doubted you.
AND, I FREAKING BELIEVE IT, NOW!!!! 😍😭😍😭😍